i've been gone for a while, it's true. sometimes opening up your life will do that.
my life is different now than it's ever been before. thank god. without change, life just stays the same.
but here's what i've learned lately. that when the present somehow does not match up to my previous vision of what the present would look like when it was still my future...
(does that make sense?)
...i'm not so quick to catch up.
i struggle. i make a fuss. i withdraw. there's temper tantrum or two.
all before i get it together and realize that the present, exactly as it is, is way better than i could have imagined.
i've gotten all caught up on details, and lost sight of the bigger picture.
what can i say? i'm a little slow.
thank god finally the universe is beating it out of me. by providing daily, in spades, evidence that my life now is far richer and abundant than i ever knew it could be.
my friends, my family, my house, my cat...
let's face it. i've got it pretty great.
there's a man living in my house with me now, in our house. a fisherman, to be exact.
sometimes now the dishes stay dirty. sometimes there's a mangled copy of 'sports illustrated' and a baseball wedged into the couch cushions. sometimes stray white socks show up in surprising places.
but really, who cares? if i spend the rest of my life rinsing whiskers out the sink and closing the kitchen drawers, so be it.
the fisherman helps make life such a better place to live, i'll take it. i'll take it all.
and by the time i've finished puttering through the house, picking up things here and there, seeing evidence of a boy in the joint, who cares if life looks like i thought it would?
this is way way better.
where 'you been all my life?